Thursday, January 31, 2013

Law of Attraction

The “Law of Attraction” says that you attract into your life whatever you think about. Your dominant thoughts will find a way to manifest. So by means of pulling all thoughts in my head towards me, I’ll be posting some of my “possible” wish list that I want to have as a reward this March.
I’m not an Apple fan, by the way. But when this iphone 5 was released and all of my friends have it, it suddenly pop out in my head and eventually, I see myself liking it. Though I’m using a Samsung Galaxy Note 2, I still want this and put my smart sim in it. My mind and heart keeps on telling me, “I want this! I want this! I want this!”

My dad promised me to give me an ipad once he got money from his bidding (he bids ambulance, patrol sidecars, motorcycle to LGU’s and other government agencies that need these). Ipad 3 is already fine with me but if this new ipad that will be released on late February or early March 2013 is quite price-good, I would definitely choose this. Teeeheeeee!!!!!
Hey, Samsung Galaxy digital camera! I'll have you in my hands VERY VERY SOON!

I need a new digicam. I really need it! My old digicam (Sony tx10) doesn’t give me good quality of photos anymore. It already reached its maximum actuations (which 10,000) and the quality of photos are now grainy. How sad :( Since I  took a hardship within my 3 years and a half of studying a program that I really need don't know how I survived it, I deserve this digital camera! :)
Canon EOS 60D, we'll be good friends SOON!

Again, my dad promised me to hand me a new dslr. I had one already (Nikon D60) but I want to try the quality of Canon and besides, my friends who take photography are using Canon. So might as well borrow their lenses and other accessories if I need to. Hihihi….

So there you are! You notice that it’s all gadgets. Well, I already collected so much girl stuff and I’m behind with electronics now. Nevertheless, I also need one of these so I can feel that I’m very much rewarded for all the hardship for 3 years and a half. Hihihi…..

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

The Art of Karma

GOLDEN RULE: Do not do unto others what you do not want to do unto you.

I’m usually a true firm believer of bad karma. Consequences from evil will make your past haunt you. Do good and let good things happen. Do bad and prepare for the worst. There are people who did bad things to me but I just let it pass by. I’m not the type of person who does things for revenge. But this time, things are getting worst. I’ll do what I have to do and so be it. I don’t want to be lied to and much more, I don’t want to be cheated on. So many things happened to me before 2012 ends but this time, I won’t let those things happen to me. This is my payback time. I can’t wait for the time that those people who hurt me the most will hurt me again this time.
What goes around comes back around. If I got to be cheated and lied on, well, sorry for you guys, it’s my time to do something now. I headlined my stupidity for the last time around but what you gave to me were most F*CKIN LIES. I looked down on myself because I can’t resist of talking to the people who stabbed me. I thought there’s a change among them but I guess they won’t change. Why are you getting freaking mad? Because you might end up losing her? Why did you cheat on her? You’re just getting afraid of becoming “nobody” in this world because no one believes in all your action behind your black shadow. I hope this will serve as your lesson. You made a wrong move, dude! What do you want to do with me? Threat me?? okei.. Then so be it. You might ashamed me in front of people but make sure that you’ll be in the right place when you do that. Make sure that you’ll be in your territory when you’re planning to do it to me. You’ll talk to my father? Why? Do you think he’ll believe you? Well, we’ll see.

You want me to stop bugging you? Then do something for your so-called "honey" or "husband" to stop bugging me too. I didn't take the first place to call or text me. He was the first one who did it. I pity you, dear! I really do! He keeps on telling me that he wants me to get back to him and never lose me again. Tsk tsk.. You guys should live the fact that you guys are getting married and look after your  "honey" or "husband" if he's trying to reach me. See???? I don't give a hell of what's going on between you guys. Live with it! You first mess with me. I'll finish it!
So say hello to your KARMA. I’ll be your WORST KARMA and you’ll never ever forget this. Next time, make sure of your moves because the next time you’ll do something to me, I really won’t let it pass by.
SEE YOU IN HELL! THE BOTH OF YOU! Yes, I'm pointing at both of you!

P.S. If you wanna try to put rocks on me, you can dial all my suncel number. HAHAHA... tsk tsk.. beware of who you are dealing with. You mind as well get f*cked up! Like what you are NOW! :D

Monday, January 28, 2013

graduation + diploma

On my graduation, I want to wear white dress and a pair of beige wedge. I also want to have curly hair and put my make up on. I’ll also wear my silver watch and jewelleries. Behind those pretty things on a pretty face, I want to be with my loved ones. I want to see there my mom, dad, sister, brother-in-law, and my 2 niece because they are big part of my success. I want them to see me how I walk wearing those pretty things and blue toga on me as I hand my diploma and shake hands with big people on our prestigious school.
That diploma will become a big part of me. Behind that diploma are the episodes in my life that made me who I am now. From way up to downward, that diploma witnessed how I struggled just to aim for the success. Nevertheless, receiving my diploma is not yet my success. It’s just the BEGINNING of my victory.
Between my struggles are the tears and joys that taught me lessons in my everyday living. People that I met gave me extra power to get what I have to get. I thought I can’t stand up again and walk during the days of my tears. Disappointments hit me but it turned to better understanding of things around me. Plans were made but in the end, it just broke down into pieces. But I know behind those broken pieces of plans will be surrogated someday. A plan that will turn into reality and a happiness that will make me understand that not all things are meant to be.
On the day of my graduation, I’ll be the happiest girl in the world. I lost my happiness but I know I’ll be better little by little. I want to see all the people who made my dreams come true. All those people including the people who brought me down and gave impact to my life. Who I am now will be the reflection of who I am yesterday. Yesterday, today, and tomorrow are different. Yesterday I learned. Today I’m learning. Tomorrow I’ll learn. So many things I want to understand but my brain doesn’t allow me to understand it. It doesn't allow me because I think I have to experienc eit first.  However, so many incidents in my life that I have to forget and replace it by good memories. Yesterday, I was this person who wanted to explore different world and feel where I can be comfortable with. Now, I learned that one should be in the world where everyone else has the same feature as you. Mindset should be the number 1 priority in the world that you want to get along to. All people are different and not all people have same mindset. But one should have better understanding on things around him. Because you can’t get from the other what you’ve got from the other side.
As I go through my journey, I realize who I really am. I got to know myself in different ways. Some will like me, some will don’t. It’s given and I can accept it. Some may think I’m bad. Some may think I’m not. People do have their own perceptions. All I know now is, I learned how to fight for my right and I learned how to motivate myself during my excruciating moments.
I’ll never forget my life behind my diploma. The diploma that I’ll be receiving on March will be the result for all my adversities for 3 years and a half of reaching for success. ; and that diploma will be the picture of who I am now for all the people who have hurt me in the rollercoaster ride of my life.
And oh by the way, I believe good people deserve good things in life. I wish to have this on my graduation and I hope He’ll grant this for me. Oh Papa J, I want to have this. Please oh Please! I’m just simple. Just this and I would be fine. Any color will do.. even 16 GB of BLACK! hihihihi.... *cross fingers*


Saturday, January 26, 2013

iphone 4s for my smart network

Okei.. so aside from being a fashion enthusiast and a camera lover, I’m also a techy person but not that much. I just know how each technology works but I don’t know how to troubleshoot it. Hahaha… so ironic then!

Last December 2012, I bought a new phone as a Christmas/birthday gift to myself. It’s a phone that can actually manipulate as a mini computer and can do multi-task since it has stylus. I know what you’re thinking guys. It’s not an iphone 5 since it doesn’t have a stylus. Haha.. it’s a Samsung Galaxy Note 2. Actually, before I buy it, I had a dilemma between Samsung S3 and a Note 2. My friend, who works in an advertising/marketing company, which he holds the account of Samsung, discussed to me the difference between S3 and Note 2. Both phones performs really good. In my case, he suggested to have S3 rather than Note 2. Note 2 can actually give me satisfaction when it comes to its features. Actually, when it comes to size, S3 is better than Note 2. If you’re a minute-by-minute texter, Note 2 is not for you. Note 2 is too big and it can’t fit in one palm and it’s really for executives since it can be your daily planner and it can do multi-tasking for you. You just have to subscribe for a data plan consist of unlimited internet surfing so you can maximize the use of the phone. On the other hand, if you’re a minute-second-hour texter, S3 is so for you. S3 is smaller than Note 2. The only difference of those phones are the image quality, screen size, and of course, the use of stylus. That’s it. Note 2 is made for executives that doesn’t want to bring so much stuff with them. You can surf the internet without any hassle since the screen is big and you won’t have any difficulties of reading emails. You don’t have to use your finger since stylus can work it for you. I don’t have any regrets on buying that phone. I prefer bigger and complicated phones than smaller and easy-to-use phones. I love playing it since the features are very new to me. The phone is so me and I don’t have issues about it.

Meanwhile, since I have two networks that I’m using (globe and smart), I still have to look for an extra phone (or should I say, my “main” phone too since business transactions are made in my smart number) that I could hold out in public especially when I have meetings with the big men. I’m not a fan of iphone but I think I need one. I’m not aiming for an iphone 5. Iphone 4s can be my friend as long as I have it. My bosses are all using iphone and they’re advising me to have one. I have no choice. They influenced me already. They're all using iphone so I guess I should've get one. I WON’T sell my Note 2 because you know.. I’m in love with it. My concern is, I NEED AN IPHONE 4S for the sake of standards. My gwad! I have an extra phone for my smart but I guess it’s not enough for me. HAHAHA…. Arte ba? Yah, I know! But it’s a statement that I have to maintain. Ganun ata talaga pag ang mga kaharap mo e mga executives! Grrrrr…..

So is there anyone who sells iphone 4s in a cheaper price? Please do let me know. I need a brand new one. As much as I don’t want iphone, I still need to have one. I don’t have a date on valentines so I don’t have anyone to spend my money for. Haha.. I guess I’ll just spend my valentine’s with the phone and myself. Or maybe, you can gift it to me as your valentine’s/graduation gift since I'll be graduating on March *cross fingers*. I’m not blinkered. I prefer one gift for 2 occassions. Black or white color.. I don’t mind it. Just the iphone 4s that I would mind. HAHAHA…. But if you're willing to donate me an iphone 4s, BLACK color would be ACCEPTABLE! NYAHAHAHA..... :D

Thursday, January 10, 2013

My New Year’s Resolution for 2013

1. More time for fitness. I need to achieve the 105 lbs. this year because I want to pull off the best version of me – to become leaner, stronger, and most especially… SEXIER! (naks!)

2. Read more books, petix mode less. I have to get myself on MORE books for a better grammar and more vocabulary. When you read more, the more you gain knowledge.

3.  More time for studying. Study! Study! Study! That’s what people are complaining about me. I want to study photography, fashion, and new media design. I want to continue what I started. I want to continue my real passion and try to enter the world of those crafts. Maybe in that world, I can excel like how other people excel on their own expertise.

4. Fashion wise, I want to improve on how I dress up. I want to invest on flats shoes and more lady-like clothes. Since I’m already 25, I have to be more on semi-casual look than hippie-fashionista outfit. Oh well, we’ll see. It’s a matter of you carry it and put swag on it.

5. Career wise, I have to be 2 steps ahead. My friends already have a good position with a good salary. If the company that I’m connected with now offer me a good position with a good paying salary, I will surely grab it. But if they don’t have any plan for me, then I think I have to look for a better job that suits my standards.

6. I should have a routine for cleaning my room. My room is a mess and a snake can live with it. Too much girl stuff caused the mess of my room and honestly, I can’t manage it now. Whew! Hello walk-in closet! I really need you NOOOOOW!

7. Continue the art of blogging. Blog! Blog! Blog! And let everyone know my insights. People can get to know me by reading my blog.

8. More to photos, not being photographed. Nyahahaha….. Okay, so basically, I’m a camera freak. I always want to be photographed. That’s why I haven’t practiced my basic skills in photography. This year, I should hold my camera and capture the beautiful moments in life. Last year, I missed a lot of events since I was so lazy to take photos. This year should be different. I’ll promise to myself that I’ll love again the art of photography and witness the capturing moments of adorable episode in my life.

9. Save more, shopping less. I spent a lot of money last year in buying clothes, shoes, bags, and accessories most especially when I was at the hype of crying my moments. They say, shopping is every girl’s best friend and shopping can make a girl’s depression fade away.

10. No to love life. This year, I should be wiser in entering a relationship. I got hurt so much that I lose myself just to be healed.  I should learn to choose who to love and who to believe so I won’t be upset if circumstances happen. This year, I should get to know first the people who want to enter my life. I don’t want to be cheated and lie again. One is enough and that’s it. Lessons have been learned and those lessons are charged to experience. I have learned a lot and I think it’s already best for me to become aware of. PROMISES ARE MEANT TO BROKEN. FOREVER ISN’T TRUE. Mr. Cupid should arrow the next person who worth the pain and joy since he already knew what I’ve been for the past 2 years.

Photo bombed

So let me tell some things about me. If you’re following my instragram (instagram name: nostalgicmortal) and facebook, you’ll notice that I always take photos of myself and you might get irritated. Some of my friends tell me that I’m too vain because once they open their facebook account, it’s my photo that’s first to be seen. So sorry about that. I told you I’m a camera buff. I used to study photography but unfortunately, I was the one being photographed that’s why I wasn’t able to learn the advance photography.

I love being photographed. I dreamt of becoming a model when I was a kid but it was just only a dream. I know I can’t be a model because 1.) I don’t have the height. I’m only 5’0. 2.) I’m quite chubby. I stopped working out because I have to concentrate on my studies since I only do my thesis now. 3.) I don’t have the guts to walk on the runway. I’m shy to show myself in front of people. I can project in front of the camera but not totally like a pro model or even a fashion blogger. I’m just a wanna-be like them. J

I don’t know why I got to like camera. I just love to see myself in photos, how I smile, and how do I like.

I love how my hair turned out this way. I didn’t have a bad-hair-day on this. This was taken last December 10, 2012 when we celebrated our dearest Scarloe’s 7th month old birthday while we were watching Pacquiao-Marquez game. I used my ate’s ipad and maximized the time of using it since the one who uses it was still sleeping. Hihihi… *peace Yin-Yin*


My “amazing-baby” pose. I often have a good shot on wacky poses. Glad it turned out quite good on this photo.

I was eating J.CO donut on this photo that’s why I got to have a “ngiwi” smile.
Two sides of me. Do I look mataray if I don’t smile? What do you think? Yay or nay? J

So here’s the outcome of being camera freak J any comments? J

So let me show another set of my “vain” photos. These photos were taken on Christmas Eve while talking to my someone special. J I just feel pretty at that night because I like my attire. J I was wearing a bodycon teal sleeveless and a low-waist skinny jeans. Though I looked fat since it was Christmas season but my bodycom hid the flabbyness of my tummy J Skinny jeans were also perfect in me. I guess it was sized on my waistline as well as on my big bun legs. Nyahahahaha…… J

From my instagram: nostalgicmortal

I love this photo. This look reminds of the blessings that I have. There are more reasons to smile and that I have to live the life that I have. I’m so thankful that God didn’t let me drowned in pain and heartache that I’ve been through on the last part of the year.


I apologize for my eyebags. I got to sleep before Noche Buena hits the clock.
from my instagram: nostalgicmortal

So there you are. I already gave you a simple hint of who I am. So don’t be surprised if you open your facebook and startle you with my overloading photos. I’m a camera freak and fashion-enthusiast. Take it or leave it. J

2012 year ender

If you’re a reader of my blog, you’ll notice that it’s all about heartbreak. But it says on my blog description that I’m a fashion-enthusiast and a camera buff. How weird is that?! HAHA.. Oh well, 2012 wasn't a good year for me. What’s best on that year is that, I took my comprehensive exam for the 2nd time around and gladly, I passed it! J Comprehensive exam is the last exam that should be taken in our program in ADMU (Master in Environmental Management) before proceeding to our master’s project (equivalent for a thesis). This comprises all the subjects and learnings that we had on our 3-year class and the exam is oral not written. And for you to know, I’m not good in oral examination and even reporting. I easily get butterflies in stomach every time I’m in front of people. But I know I’ll overcome it in time. HAHA..

So enough of my comprehensive exam. The important thing is, I PASSED! Right? Basically, my 2012 was a rollercoaster ride. Sometimes I was up and sometimes I was down. I didn’t notice the people who rode with me; that they were just sitting at the ride and watching over me; letting me do what I think best for me until I realize it is not the best after all.

I lost love at the last quarter of the year. I didn’t know how to pick the pieces of me when I lose myself. I let myself cry to sleep at night and even get so much drunk on weekends just to fill up the incomplete part of myself. Pieces of advice were scattered around the corner. I tried to sync it in my head because I wanted to help myself from standing up again.

Losing of the person you love doesn’t mean losing the people you have left when you were blinded by love. These were the people who I got hurt and took them forgranted when I offered my world to someone who I thought my FUTURE FOREVER. These were the people I didn’t expect I can run to when everything’s falling apart.
God has been pretty good to me. He gave me the best of everything accordingly. My prayers were answered one step at the time and gave me the people I needed the most. First, He sent back the closeness that I and my childhood friends back. We had time to hang out with each other and bring the most out of it. They helped me to be happy since I felt that I was left hanging in the air by the questions that have been stuck into my head.
From Joyer's intagram

From Joyer's intagram

These photos were taken last November 2, 2012 when I asked them to accompany me to buy a new office bag in Megamall. These are my 2 childhood friends who really know me well. I'm so glad that we could hang out like this even if I haven't been with them for almost 2 years. We could only hang out with each other during christmas and new year since we have our different lives even if we live in the same village and guess what... our house is just one step from each other.

From Joyer's intagram
This is my most favourite photo of ours. They asked me to make face since they know that I’m not getting good. I was in a worry mood at that time and thinking too much between I and him. So to make the moment quite good, here’s the solution for it. Isn’t it good? J HAHAHA...
Second, my family got closer now. My parents treated me as their "baby bunso". I'm very well-taken cared of. My mom prepares my breakfast in the morning and my daddy always asks to be accompanied by me everytime he wants to go out. Daddy even dated me last Dec. 26 at Kimpura, Greenhills after he shopped me with clothes and shoes as his christmas gift to me. I'm back to being spoiled brat again and I'm loving it. HAHAHA....
Third, I was able to go to places I haven't been before. I was brought by my friends and they let me experienced cheap thrills. Cheap thrills make me feel like a kid again most especially when I get dirty all over my clothes and got stained by streetfood sauce. (masyado akong alagain pagdating sa mga ganyang bagay). HAHAHA….
Fourth, I felt the love and care from my sister and brother-in-law. They gave me the happiest Christmas gift ever – shopping at Forever21 plus a set of imported body lotion and a perfume. I know I’m kind of “mababaw” kid but those are my weakness as my “kaartehan”. Everyone knows that I’m “maarte” and that came to be part of my well-being. HAHAHAHA….. My sister also considered me as her “bestfriend” since I’m always there for her during good times and most especially bad times. I want to repay all her goodness to me in spite and despite of ups and downs as being sisters. I always want to be there for her throughout the way most especially when she’s getting hurt by all her adjustments in so many things. We’re just 2 siblings and there’s no one we can get help and assistance from except from the both of us. So we just have to accept each other’s flaws whether we like it or not. HAHAHA….

Fifth, I was really surprised when my colleagues already spoke about me. I was teary-eyed when they were advising me about so many things. I felt their love and concern to me since they know what I truly deserve. I felt how special I am to them and showed me what’s best in me. I know I have so many flaws but still, they accepted me for who I am and they’re thankful that I became part of their lives.

Actually, I just felt the “best” part of my 2012 during the very last portion of it. I never expected that we’ll be closer than this. I even shared to them my most secret in life and what they did was to hug me tight and promised me that they won’t ever lose the grasp of our relationship. They gave me best friendship that we could have and I even considered them as my 2 big bros J
These photos were taken during Raiza’s birthday party last November 23, 2012. This was the craziest moment of lives that we even got to sleep in a resto-bar because of our drunken-ness so I really do apologize for my look. I was in the influence of too much alcohol at that moment and in the hype of crazy-ness as well.

I’m very thankful for all the people who have been there for me at my falling-apart season. You never fail of extending support to me and hug me with your love and care. Thank you for those nights of being intoxicated and days of being cray cray. Now I know what people mean when they say “I’m so blessed” because you defined it by means of your deeds. I won’t ever forget all the pieces of advice that you showered to me. I know I’ll find my very own true love someday because God is still busy writing and directing my love story and He wants it to be a blockbuster one. I’ll be looking forward to more and prosperous blessings this 2013 and I want it to share with you. Thank you for coming into my life. You are very much welcome to join my ride in my everyday journey.